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The Golden Rule to Help Guide Your Next Decision.

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When people show you who they are, believe them.

I say it all the time, but I find, especially as women, that we want to give people the eternal benefit of the doubt and second, third and fourth chances. There is no end to the evidence and yet we still want to believe the best.

In some cases, this can be an incredible quality.

We don’t just throw people out at the first mistake.

But in other cases, we’re just unwilling to see the truth and it ends up costing us, not them.

Recently with a client of mine, it became infinitely clear that staying at her job wasn’t going to work long-term. After three frank conversations with her manager – all met with consistent defensiveness and blame placed squarely on my client’s shoulders in spite of my client having an impeccable 12-year career track record – it was obvious that nothing was going to budge.

Her manager was set in stone and it was time to either make a move or risk more hits to her confidence and, in turn, her career.

When people show you who they are, believe them.

With another client, there have been two rounds of unexplained layoffs that have all but melted the motherboard of the organization since a new leader arrived a year ago.

Even her manager has assured her that it wouldn’t be her fault if she left, almost nudging her out the door for her own good.

So, she could stay and keep trying to change the writing on the wall or she could see that she’s put in enough time to reveal the leader for who they are as evidenced by the unaligned actions they’ve taken.

When people show you who they are, believe them.

Wherever you are right now in your career or in your life, take a look around.

Is there a dynamic or relationship or environment that just hasn’t changed despite your best efforts?

This isn’t to say everything should be easy or things should always go your way or even be satisfying all the time, but you know the situations where you’ve been doing your best and it’s just not budging.

Things aren’t changing.

You’ve tried several avenues and strategies and conversations, but the other party, business, or partner keeps showing up in the same way. This can swing from mildly discouraging acts of not supporting you all the way to blatant gaslighting.

Either way, you’re seeing it.

You might even be trying to ignore it.

But you know the truth.

When people show you who they are, believe them.

The question to ask yourself is, “If nothing changes, where will I be in a year?”

If that answer scares you or looks the same, it might be time to make a move.

Trust that you have all the evidence you need.

The best way to see things for what they are is to see them together.

With me as your executive coach, my eyes are on everything in your environment so you’re fully aware, fully informed, and fully prepared.

Book a free 30-minute call with me to find out how we can work together.

Pooja Dang is a Women’s Executive Leadership Coach based in the San Francisco Bay Area, serving clients globally at companies such as Google, GoPro, Dropbox, and more. With over 15 years of experience in coaching, advising, and propelling women towards rapid career advancement and promotion, she specializes in high-impact workshops and dynamic 1:1 coaching, delivering breakthrough outcomes and accelerated change. Pooja has a proven track record of coaching women into the C-suite and is a trusted expert in growing executive presence, expanding influence, high-stakes negotiations, and leadership development. Using proven scientific strategies, transformative behavior tools, and a no-BS approach, Pooja is on a mission to empower more women to live confidently at the top of their game. Book your free consultation today. #ExecutiveCoach #LeadershipDevelopment #WomenInLeadership #BehaviorChange #CsuiteCoaching

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